The Greatest Gift I Could Ever Ask For

My parents, Lilia & Simon Paykin, and me after receiving my Master of Accounting Science degree

I am blessed. There’s no other way to put it. I’ve been gifted two incredible, distinct forces in my life that came together to provide a perfect blend of nature and nurture.

To say that my parents have polar opposite personalities is an understatement. My mother tackles risk head-on, attempting things out of her comfort zone to make mistakes, discover, and learn. My father practices a conservative strategy and analyzes with meticulous, calculated steps along the way. My mom looks at the big picture and doesn’t sweat the small stuff. My dad plans things out and considers every detail prior to engaging.

In isolation, both of their approaches have flaws. However, in tandem, their personalities lend themselves to create an incredible combination that feeds off of each others’ strengths. I’m fortunate to have witnessed both of their personalities as I’ve matured and learned to take the best aspects from both worlds.

In 3rd grade, I distinctly remember one particular night when I brought home a multiplication worksheet. I was struggling to understand even the basics. My father tried to help me, but he was tired from work and lost patience. Waking up at 4:30 in the morning every day and working overtime six days a week will do that to you.

I appreciated his efforts, but I was still left confused and overwhelmed. My mother saw this and jumped in immediately, filling the void by going through each problem, step-by-step until I understood it. Regardless of how long each problem was taking, she stood up late to ensure that I wasn’t left without guidance.

There have been countless times in my life where my mother knew when to provide assistance but, conversely, when to let me make my own mistakes. It would be very easy for her to lean to one extreme or the other, but she has an incredible ability to balance the two.

I’m grateful to be able to learn from her impressive execution of patience, sympathy and restraint.

One of the many lessons my father has taught me is to “always be knocking”. No memory is a better representation of this than when I got laid off for the first time.

After numerous interviews and hundreds of applications, I was fortunate to land an internship. A little over a month in, the company realized that they hired too many people into the same role. Of the three of us, I was the youngest and the others were in line to potentially get full-time offers because they were graduating seniors. The firm made the most practical choice and let me go.

I was devastated.

A couple of months prior, when I had let my father know that I had received this opportunity, he was elated. He was so proud of me because he had witnessed my participation in numerous networking events and career fairs.

I dreaded the call on my walk back to the apartment. I felt like I was letting my mother and father down. My parents, being immigrants from the former Soviet Union, stressed the importance of a good career and financial security. It’s an immigrant mentality, regardless of where you come from. So to tell them that I was laid off, despite the reason or circumstance, was terrifying.

After listening to country music for over an hour to procrastinate, I finally worked up the courage to call him.

Choking up, I explained to my father what had happened. Expecting disappointment, I was shocked to hear him say the following:

“It’s ok! These things happen, David. You just have to keep knocking on those doors like you did before you landed this internship.”

My father chose to reinforce positivity and a glass-half-full mentality instead of the pessimism that I know so many parents could have defaulted into. After a couple more words of encouragement from my father, we said “I love you” to each other, as we do with every call, and hung up.

My father has not known this until now, but after that call, it was if the world was saying “I’m watching you,” when my music resumed to the next song — George Straight’s “Love Without End, Amen”.

Needless to say, I’ve never sprinted to a bathroom quicker to bawl my eyes out.

So I continued to knock on those doors and I still do to this day. I always will.

I want to make it abundantly clear that the reason I have the privilege to live with such happiness and gratitude is because of the framework in which my parents raised me. I may wholeheartedly disagree with some of my parents’ views or what they believe is right for me, but I recognize that they do it out of love and with the best intentions.

To you, Mom & Papa, thank you for being the most generous and supportive role models I could’ve ever asked for. This post doesn’t do justice to the countless times you’ve done the right thing at the right time to shape who I am, but my hope is that it gives a peek into the life lessons you’ve taught me.

I will never be able to give to you as much as you have given me, but I intend to spend the rest of my life doing the most with what I’ve been provided, as well as sharing these experiences that I was fortunate to grow up with.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you and I love you.

To those reading this, I realize that saying what I wish for out loud is a cardinal sin. However, as cheesy as it may sound, my hope is that you think back to the people who have done things for you that have had a fundamental, positive impact on who you are today.

Whether it be a parent, relative, teacher, friend or boss, making the effort to reach out to just one of these people and letting them know you appreciate what they’ve done for you can have a massive impact.

Don’t wait for the right moment. It doesn’t exist. If not for them, then do it for you. To know that they know.